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Brain in a Jar

(Topic prompted by desireearmfeldt)

Well, I am a brain in a jar, of course. At least, that's what I infer from available evidence. I've never seen it directly, admittedly, but I imagine my brain floating in its container, kept alive by a nutrient solution pumped in and an extraction system that pumps waste out. Data is also pumped in, through various inbound channels, and when I form intentions to do something those intentions are intercepted and translated into signals on various outbound channels.

What happens after that, well, I don't really know how the implementation works, but I do observe that my subsequent inputs coordinate pretty well with my outputs. That is, if I form the intention to pick up a coffee cup, I subsequently get input consistent with that coffee cup being picked up. The thing is, that's true only to a limited extent. Severely limited, really. There's all sorts of intentions I form where that coordination just fails. If I form the intention to materialize a coffee cup out of thin air, for example, the inputs I subsequently get fail to synchronize with that intention at all.

So, anyway, I hope that information helps you people reproduce the bug.

I don't hold out much hope that you'll actually fix it, though. You don't even bother to acknowledge receipt of my bug reports and letters of complaint, which frankly is just a bad business practice. I don't like to make threats, but surely you must understand that sooner or later you're simply going to lose all your loyal customers if you continue such shoddy practices.

I look forward to hearing from you about this issue.


( 16 comments — Leave a comment )
Apr. 13th, 2012 06:32 pm (UTC)
Intelligent design, my ass! (Which, given my recent lower back issues, is less rhetorical than it might be.)
Apr. 13th, 2012 06:57 pm (UTC)
(nods) Before that role was usurped by the fact that blood is toxic to neurons, I used to declare knees and the spine the best available evidence against humans being intelligently designed.
Apr. 14th, 2012 09:42 am (UTC)
don't forget the eyes wired so the wiring is in front of the sensor (retina)!

[though clearly Squid etc got EyeBall v2]
Apr. 14th, 2012 02:09 pm (UTC)
(nods) And the cabling runs right through the middle of it. Bad design. Though the workaround for that is pretty elegant.
Apr. 15th, 2012 11:36 am (UTC)
Elegant, is it? Clearly you're not one of those waiting on the hardware upgrade to prevent the crossover of signals between two separate senses. "It's a feature, not a bug", they say, but I'm the one stuck with a glitchy system and no target fix time.
Apr. 15th, 2012 02:41 pm (UTC)
Actually, I am, although I was in my thirties before I realized it was actually a thing and not just a weird idiosyncrasy of mine.
Apr. 15th, 2012 03:37 pm (UTC)
I actually count photoptarmosis as a feature (albeit a quirky one). It's not especially annoying to me when it happens on its own, and being able to voluntarily trigger a sneeze is occasionally useful...
Apr. 13th, 2012 06:55 pm (UTC)
<giggles> I appreciate your bug report.
Apr. 13th, 2012 06:56 pm (UTC)
* is marginally mollified *
Apr. 13th, 2012 06:57 pm (UTC)
I should perhaps clarify that I appreciate that you are filing a bug report, being one of many who are too lazy to do so. :)

Edited at 2012-04-13 06:58 pm (UTC)
Apr. 13th, 2012 10:06 pm (UTC)
This reminds me of a short story:
The Question, by Laurence M. Janifer and Donald E. Westlake.
(http://www.scribd.com/doc/63207153/24/The-Question#outer_page_135 -- scroll down a bit, it's under a thousand words)

Edited at 2012-04-13 10:06 pm (UTC)
Apr. 13th, 2012 10:16 pm (UTC)
I remember that book fondly.
Apr. 14th, 2012 12:19 am (UTC)
Hmm. Can you discern any pattern distinguishing the intentions that generate synchronized inputs from those that don't? For that matter, is it consistent which intentions fall in which category? (Ignoring for the moment the period when your brain was experiencing a hardware failure.)
Apr. 14th, 2012 04:16 am (UTC)
Heh. My brain is *always* experiencing hardware failure. Don't even get me started on the whole 'sleep' thing. But I understand what you mean.


There certainly seems to be a pattern, in that I'm rarely surprised. Sure, it happens sometimes that synchronization fails when I expected it to succeed, or succeeds when I expected it to fail, but those are both pretty rare. I've been moderately successful with the interface by just avoiding output I don't expect the server to handle.

But characterizing that pattern is difficult.

I've been somewhat active in a user community that has made reasonable progress in working out some of the patterns involved, but it still has quite a ways to go.
(Deleted comment)
Apr. 15th, 2012 07:25 am (UTC)
Re: Closed - More info needed
Reassigned to feature request. Not a bug.

We might work on this for the next major version. Though if you can submit a patch, we'll try to review it.
( 16 comments — Leave a comment )

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